There are five modules in my daughter’s DBT (Dialectical Behavioral Therapy) group, consisting of four weeks each. New families come and go at the end of each module, and today was the first graduation we had been part of as the last one occurred while we were away on vacation.
There was one youth that has been by themselves throughout our time in this group. I was curious about this internally, because you are supposed to have a family support there (and in one case both parents are there), to ensure greater success of the program when these tools are applied back home.
Today, there were two graduates, including this teen and as they were discussing what this course meant to them, it was revealed that they had to leave the room a few times because they found it hard (and I just teared up writing this), seeing other parents present and getting along with their children. As I listened, tears continued to gather in my eyes. It broke my heart. Here was this funny kid, doing their part to learn to cope better in this ever divided world, and there was nobody there to support them. No one there to work on these skills with.
These kids are here because they have really struggled. The wait to get therapy never mind to be accepted in this program was long. I look back at my daughter’s journey to this point and the long road still ahead, and marvel as I hear this youth speak well beyond their years. They have come to accept their situation as it is, but I know they will be a different parent because of this course and a desire to not follow in their parents footsteps.
Parenting is hard. Being present isn’t.
Show up.